A traumatic or negative birth experience can deeply impact a birthing woman and affect her emotionally and physically for years to come. When power is removed from a laboring woman and she feels dismissed, scared, abused, unheard or inept, she can shut down. This can manifest in depressive symptoms, disconnection from her baby, disconnection from her partner, confusion on behalf of her partner on how to help her, and minimization of her experience because her baby is there and healthy.
Being an experienced professional that has been fully immersed in the birth field since 2009, one of the most common questions I get when talking with new clients, strangers and even my bank teller (I'm there often enough, she even recommended a client to me!) is who should they choose to catch their baby?
At Tulsa Family Doulas, we know every birth can be good. Your birth can be good. Every birth is normal and natural. If you tell us you want a natural birth or a normal birth, we will ask what that means to you, help you prepare for your vision of a "good birth," and support you every step of the way.
This summer has been insane. No really, like pack the house up to move, keep building a business because it's all up to you, oh yeah, you have 3 kids out of school, insane. So in between my inherent need to honor the inner night owl that welcomes my second wind at 9:00 PM and telling my children to shut my bedroom door and enjoy Netflix, yogurt and granola bars when they wake up at 6:30 AM, I have to balance working and mothering and home (box?) keeping.
There are many traditional methods of utilizing the placenta and honoring it for the life that it was able to provide. The placenta was often historically viewed as a magical healing organ that was best utilized immediately upon delivery from the womb. It was viewed as a skin healing agent, as part of medicinal ointments and naturopathic remedies.
Hospitals and medical institutions view the organ as human waste and have come across much controversy in some communities for blatantly disrespecting the sacredness of the organ. Culturally, the placenta was viewed as part of the newborn, the source of life and even so far as a comfort or bed for the baby while in utero.
Let's talk real for a bit. Being a new mom is hard. Pull your hair out, oh my gosh, I can't believe I did this, hard. You mutter words under your breath at 3AM after you had only laid your head back down on the pillow at 2:25AM. And then you take another look at your sweet baby and get all gushy again.
The scariest depiction of zombie movies and video games have nothing on you as you stumble to the kitchen in the mornings mumbling, "Booooobs, Poooooop, Coooooofffeeee."
In the recovery room, my baby fussed at the breast, my tired body tight with tension.
Thankfully, the Lactation Counselor walked in. “I’m having trouble getting her to latch.” Briskly, the Lactation Counselor grabbed my boob, without as much as a hello, and attempted to shove it in my baby’s mouth.
I felt even more stressed by this woman invading my new mom space, but even worse, her hands smelled like crap. Yep, her hands on my breast and my baby smelled like poop. After a while she was able to get the baby latched, but it was so painful, like I was going to claw the ceiling painful.
Tulsa's Cloth Diaper Service, Itty Bitty Bum Bums, is going to make cloth diapering life so much easier.
I was able to talk with Lori Rivers, owner and founder of Itty Bitty Bum Bums about the opening of her cloth diaper service opening here in Tulsa and serving Midtown, South and West Tulsa, Sand Springs, Jenks, Bixby, Broken Arrow and Owasso.
Y'all! A Cloth Diapering Service! You read that right. So snuggle in, this is a good one.
One of the most important things you can do to prepare for the birth of your baby is to educate yourself!
I mean, we all know how the baby got in there, right? We just need to know what it takes to get the baby out when the time is right!
No matter what your goals are for your birth and postpartum period, having a thorough understanding of childbirth will help you feel more informed about everything that is going to take place when your baby (or babies!) decides to make his or her appearance.
Sadly, many people in the birth world perpetuate the thought that obstetricians are out to get you and sabotage your birth experience. It is not unheard of for some doulas to say things that make people distrust their doctors. “He’s just lazy." “She doesn’t care about your birth plan." “He is old and controlling.”
Tulsa Placenta Encapsulation is a growing trend! In February of 2014, Tulsa's Channel 8 aired a story about mothers in Tulsa choosing Placenta Encapsulation. What this means is that women are saving their placentas after the delivery of their baby to be processed and encapsulated into pills they can consume as a way to help recover after childbirth. Although the practices is ages old, it's growing in popularity among celebrities like Mad Men's January Jones and Kim Kardashian, and many women right here in Tulsa!
When I saw a gorgeous henna crown adorning the bald head of my husband’s sweet cousin, I knew I had a new skill to learn! At age 25, Alexa began a battle against Hodgkins Lymphoma which required her to undergo chemotherapy. She valiantly faced down the disease and found a way to feel beautiful despite her hair loss.
Well, there isn’t a glowing story to tell you about when I was pregnant with each of my 3 beautiful little children. I didn’t float through pregnancy on a cloud of bliss at the wonderment of creating an entire new person and enjoy the special feelings of my body expanding to accommodate their growing forms as they pulled their nourishment from me.
I did all I could to make it to the car without breaking down. I fumbled with my keys and held my breath just long enough to open the door, get in and close it before collapsing on the steering wheel in a heap of sobs. I felt as if I couldn't breathe thinking about what stood behind me. I didn't look back as I pulled out of the parking space, out of the parking lot, put on my blinker and sped away, frantically wiping tears from my blurred line of vision.
By now, I am sure you have heard all the previews for the reality show, Born In the Wild. Lifetime has done a great job of sensationalizing natural childbirth almost to the point of jaw-dropping vilification for mainstream America.
There is something captivating about childbirth. It is awe-inspiring to be participatory in watching a whole new person enter the world. Did you catch that and let it sink in? A whole new person. Woah.
I remember bringing home my daughter and thinking that it was ridiculous that the hospital would just let me leave with her. I had never parented anything more than 2 dogs and a cat. There wasn't much concern on how to make sure those animals stayed happy and alive. Food, water, go outside, throw the ball, and scoop the poop. Ta-da!
A vision statement works in birth just like it works in business. I have just recently gone through the interestingly uncomfortable process of honing in on my vision statement for my agency, Tulsa Family Doulas. Anyone who has ever worked on a vision statement for their company knows that the words of the statement will not, in and of themselves, make any business successful. Just like our birth doula clients learn that writing out their birth plan does not guarantee them their ideal birth.
What comes to mind when you think about romance? Kind words, thoughtful gifts, moonlight strolls, chocolate-dipped strawberries with a glass of champagne, and oxytocin. Wait! Oxytocin? Yes, oxytocin. What did you think this post was going to be about?
It has been called the wonder hormone, hug hormone, cuddle chemical, moral molecule, bliss hormone, but it is known best as the LOVE hormone.
There is a commonality in the profession of doula (professional birth and postpartum support) that stems from an enormous amount of compassion for a pregnant, birthing and new mom. Many stories of how one became a professional doula entail joy, excitement, sorrow and even anger. But, the reason we stay in this incredibly demanding job is because we understand the value of having someone provide a constant stream of physical, emotional and educational care during such major transitions in life.
Any woman who has given birth can tell you that the feeling of a squishy belly after several months of a taught firm belly feels a little weird. All of those months of your baby and uterus growing, your skin stretching, and your hips widening takes a toll on your body. Those first few days postpartum are something to get used to. We don’t have the same balance, as now we don’t have the extra weight pulling us forward. We don’t sleep in the same positions because now that baby isn’t in the way but we can’t go back to our pre pregnancy positions either because the uterus still needs to shrink down. Something we don’t often think about though is the baby, uterus, skin, and hips aren’t the only parts undergoing a transformation. The muscles are also equally affected. The great news is, belly binding can help!